Thursday, July 28, 2011

City of Modern Reality Part II

Light, dark and in-between, no escaping this prison of horrid creation.
Freedom is a distant illusion in this, The City of Modern Reality.
Dimentia of all time takes hold of mind, body and spirit.
The mere thought of liberation is unspokenly forbidden here.
Not sure what to do, nor where to go.
Swallowed by the darkness.
Bending to the will of the gray abyss deep within.
Lost and surrounded by the living dead souls of the past, present and all but aborted future.
We are all tools wrought from flesh and lust to carry out the devious sins allotted.
Heat rises distorting true reality with ethereal grace befitting we the corrupted.
Monsters we shall become too foul for even the chains...
Incessant trial, amassed failures, falling so hard to never get up, best to stay down.
Nothing will ever be okay again, this place sees to it with it's evil, damaging magicks.
Truth has no hope of survivial.
Misery is key.
Crawling in the dark.
Random in design, sprawling through forever, inestimable and dank, spreading like rot or a disease.
Hallucinations and delusions, dangers of desires...
Existance.

A.J. Downey
01-28-2001

Remember You

Gone so many years now, still hurts there was no goodbye.
Glad the longing has slipped away, it never should have stayed, easy to forget you except come holidays.
Why the Hell did you leave me!?
I loved you so much.
Was the truth to you a travesty to possibly believe it as such?
I stood by you as they came and went, I listened to your constant lament.
I watched you drown in constant drink.
Was it so fucking hard to stop and think!?
You woke me up at two am rapping on my bedroom window.
You cried and cried and I wouldn't let go.
I let you pass out in my bed.
I took the God damned couch instead.
I tried to tell you, beg you, show you... I loved you.
All you ever said back was "I know."
When you asked for it I gave you my body for more than a day.
I gave you my heart, you threw it away.
You hurt and I hurt for different reasons.
Now I watch the different seasons and wonder...
Which one of us gave the best line?
Better yet... which one of us was the most blind?

A.J. Downey
01-26-2001

Dreamer's Kiss

Amethyst dreams and smokey gray mirrors.
Spidersilk whispers reaching through the dark.
Touched by satin cream, caressed by milk pale skin.
Soothed so easily with honeyed words.
Gentle lips kiss me tender, heavy hands hold me near.
Drowning in a gaze of warm spring waters.
Tantalized by the sweep of raven dark hair.
Shivering with softly pressing desire.
Lost like the barest moonlit trickle in a midnight pool.
Calmer than a silverglass sea.
Far too bad it's only a distant dream.

A.J. Downey
01-25-2001

Cry of the Soul

Whispered words as strong as the best thatched cord, quicker than the thinnest spear to strike the soul, sharper than the best forged sword...
But are they whispers?
Will the tide take away the morning dew upon the driftwood's early light?
And what of the sea?
Will she always be there?
Or will she be cast as the finest net to capture the heart and loss within?

The sea shall stay as the tears of my soul will forever remain bottled, yearning for an impossible escape to grant until the anvil is struck.
And only then, against the crash, will the bottle shatter and I will be set free.
And my tears?
Shall they be as a sea?
No.
They shall be a river, pouring unto a sea, deeper than the trenches of time it's self.
But all the same,
They are just a silent cry, screaming your name.
Without sound, without hope...
It's only the cry of the soul.
So don't weep for what you do not hear.
See me not with moistened eyes.
Kiss me not for pity's sake
But turn away when I ask you to and love me not for who I am
For in the end, when I take that last walk into cold waters
Do not weep at all for it was the silent cry of the soul,
and nothing more.

A.J. Downey and Swanfrost
1-23-2001

Friday, July 1, 2011

Carpe Diem

To take away the hurt... if only I could fly free...
Just an afternoon with me under the cherry blossom trees...
Nothing to contend with, no need to pretend for anyone.

Just me and the cherry blossom trees.

Is this close to a dream?
Should I pray it not be shattered by a scream?

Watching soft petals scatter through the gently warmed air
Softly landing in the grass, on my shoulders, in my hair,
Sitting with just me,
Just me and the cherry blossom trees...

I have to stop and think
No matter what the link
That everything will be okay.
I just have to wait for the day...

A.J. Downey
01-21-2001

Of Sex and Love

Crave the salacious!
Crawling through stagnant sexual urges trying to find the flare again.
Searching through pair after pair of amorous eyes for the next wicked bit of delectable sin.
Carnal crimes of moral laws have lost their sensual appeal.
Society no longer shocked or disrupted by the lewd fantastical.
Seeking to breech one erotic thrill after the next the corruption harbored within so great the abyss seems docile now.
The desire is so confused with lust one can't begin to understand one form the next.
Despair begets madness.
Only real love can save him now.

A.J. Downey
01-21-2001

THe Physical is What They Needed

She laughed and he adored her
She cried and he told her it would all be okay
She smiled and he loved her
She lied and he forgave her... even though it hurt
She wept and he swore he'd keep her secret safe
She died and he held her, the touch of the words 'I love you' too late...

Now, as the cold gray dawn breaks, he is alone
Kneeling in one-sided conversation with granite stone
Telling himself if only... perhaps he'd not be so lonely...

The physical is what they needed,
If only he had heeded the warning signs,
This wouldn't be the bottom line...

Lost without her there,
Nothing left to share...

The cold drear rain left to wash his blood and shame from the granite stone...
Marked already with her name.

A.J. Downey
1-19-2001