Gone so many years now, still hurts there was no goodbye.
Glad the longing has slipped away, it never should have stayed, easy to forget you except come holidays.
Why the Hell did you leave me!?
I loved you so much.
Was the truth to you a travesty to possibly believe it as such?
I stood by you as they came and went, I listened to your constant lament.
I watched you drown in constant drink.
Was it so fucking hard to stop and think!?
You woke me up at two am rapping on my bedroom window.
You cried and cried and I wouldn't let go.
I let you pass out in my bed.
I took the God damned couch instead.
I tried to tell you, beg you, show you... I loved you.
All you ever said back was "I know."
When you asked for it I gave you my body for more than a day.
I gave you my heart, you threw it away.
You hurt and I hurt for different reasons.
Now I watch the different seasons and wonder...
Which one of us gave the best line?
Better yet... which one of us was the most blind?
A.J. Downey
01-26-2001
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